xx forget me not [hayahsi, echo, beck]

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REINER

Paws pounded through the forest, the strides drawn further and longer as Reiner noticed the familiarities of the tightly drawn ash and oak trees. The woods were a silent welcome to his ruffled fur, the red and black spiked in anxiety. No dominor had crossed their path as they had traveled from the Auktion Rock. Maybe there had been an ounce of truth in the standing of those Ravensbrück gods.

Reiner let his eyes wander and his pace slow as they passed the border. It smelled strongly of a dominant female and much less of a come-and-go male. For the past few weeks Reiner's presence in Dükell had been something of a reluctant obligation and whenever he found time he would slink off, ignoring boundaries as he explored the terrain surrounding his pack land. Was it fair to even call his? Hayashi had never formally accepted him, and yet on the same note she had never openly rejected his appearances either. Their relationship had hit a wall, dead and static. He'd told her of his affections, how he'd missed her. It had sparked something, sure. But then Sicoya had returned.

The pale she-wolf had always been a subtle lingering in his mind, a fragment of reality. As of recent, however, it seemed she'd taken up a more permanent residency inside him. She burst through his subconscious to stand before him in broad daylight, flicking his nose with her crystal-beaded tail. It was impossible, for her to be so real and so vivid. Sure, he desperately fought the hallucination with everything he had, but in the end it made no difference. She was always there, her blue eyes a raging sea on which he continually lost himself over and over again.

Stepping further into border, Reiner let a deep, throaty howl rise from him. It was short and yet wondering in tone. How would Hayashi react to his new visitor? Casting a glance back at his quarry, Reiner narrowed his eyes. Still submissive as ever. Hayashi would be quick to teach her differently. She had never been an advocate of slavery, for whatever reason. It was apparent she'd never lived on the rough side of things, never being a slave herself. She had always been Alpha in his eyes, always the beautiful thing that stole away from him. And somehow, between eveyrthing that had happened, Xercese had claimed her heart all those years ago. Lucky b*tch.

Hmph. He hadn't always been interested in Hayashi, sure. Micara had been the first wolf to really welcome into Hrellia. They'd been something of a pair. The pack Betas in a loose sense. What had happened to her? After Mirage's big entrance and stealing of Xercese the whole pack had gone haywire. The ranks ceased to exsist. Reiner himself had ran. The last he'd seen of Micara had been near the Auction Rock, running with Hayashi... He'd talk to Hayashi about it later. Maybe she would have answers to quiet him for a little while.

The male ended his song and began to pad away from the female, muttering a few orders. She was still a sklavin for now. She would listen well enough he knew.

"Hayashi will know what to do with you. Explain to her what happened. I'm off to sleep. Headache."

It was a lame excuse in order to avoid seeing her. But the more he thought about it, the more the form of Sicoya became stronger. He couldn't deal with that. Not now. Besides, it wasn't necessarily untrue, what he said about his headache. Whether it was real from sheer lack of food or simply self-inflicted misery was another matter.

Stumbling across the clearing, Reiner huffed with exhaustion. He hadn't made a trek like that in while, that was for sure. As soon as he met the den's entrance he slouched into a curl, his eyes shutting. Even if he wasn't asleep, he'd pretend just to get away from it all.

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[`| κιrs♥]

-- hayashi

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It was a quiet journey. Hayashi didn't know if Beck was too scared to speak, or there was some other reason behind his silence. She had too much on her mind to speak with him. Exaustion laced every step, yet well hidden from the male behind her. Her posture was still upright, her eyes narrow and searching as she lithely walked on, careful, planning. They had reached the woods not moments ago; dead, barren woods. Her land was so much more appealing in the summer, more plentiful. After the snowfall, all the color seemed to be buried under it. However, the stark white of the crystal snow did outline the land with beauty, giving it a new face. The red cardinals stuck out against the iced branches, the snow glittering under their wings. The trees tangled with the pale blue sky, illuminated by the pale sunlight. It was a dull beauty.

Finally, the duo reached the borderline of her new land, marked by a large, broad oak tree with weeping limbs. As soon as a cream paw passed over the imaginary line, Hayashi knew something was askew. Her ears shot up, and she halted with a growl. A new scent. Who could it be? She didn't smell any threat, and it was fairly new. Did Reiner have a visitor, or was he hurt? Strange. The alpha moved on at a slightly quicker pace, picking up a smooth trot. She didn't want to worry Beck just yet. It could just be nothing, but she had to be sure.

A howl pierced the air. It wasn't alarmed or panicked, but Hayashi couldn't find a reason why Reiner would be howling. Had something happened? She moved on even faster, looking behind her to make sure Beck followed. She had a feeling she shouldn't have left. In moments, they had reached the den area, and all Hayashi could see was a small, lone wolf. At first glance, it resembled Reiner. But it wasn't. Harmless. Almost forgetting Beck behind her, she approached the stranger with a sharp growl, stopping just a few feet from the wolf.

"Who are you? Why are you here?"

Without waiting for a response, she whipped her head to the side, catching movement out of the corner of her eye. She peered into the mouth of the cave, seeing a figure lying there, it's chest slowly rising, falling. Reiner. The idiot! Hayashi's blue eyes narrowed as she stalked up the slight incline to the den, towering over Reiner's half-asleep figure. A growl bubbled from her throat, warning him that he better be listening.

"Reiner!" she barked, barely waiting for him to come to his sense. "Did I tell you that you could leave the lands alone, unattended? And come back with a slave? And even more, you leave the poor thing out there by herself, to explain to the alpha why she was brought here? For all I knew, you were in danger! If I hadn't been of clear mind, I would've attacked that wolf out there. Is that what you wanted? Wake up! She huffed. Sometimes he didn't use that brain of his, but there was something that kept him around.

Hayashi returned to where she left Beck and the stranger standing, taking deep breaths to level her head. She sat in between the two, her face blank, calm. She cleared her throat before speaking again, her honey voice level, anger disappeared. "Excuse me, dears. He needs a speaking to every once in a while." She turned to the stranger beside her with a stern smile. "Name, stranger?"[/blockquote][/size][/color]

[Dakki]

The wolf's pace was quick, she was surprised by his random racing speed. She thought back to what he had said before he took off, his voice sounded urgent when he announced that they were going to meet her new Alpha. Echo found it strange that he had called her Alpha and not Master. Was Alpha the name that she preferred to be called? Never the less the surroundings around her began to change. She smelt many wolves in the wind that rushed past here. How many wolves did this Alpha have? By the scent there were many slaves around. Strange... her last master had only 3 slaves. Maybe this Hayashi ran under different rules.

The brute slowed his pace suddenly. Echo had to dig her heels in so she wouldn't bump into his backside. She watched as he raised his head, a howl breaking free from his maw. All Echo could do was just watch, her one ear filling up with the beautiful melody. Then, he muttered something before heading off. Echo's pale blue eyes blinked several times, unsure of what to do now. Looking around, she seemed to be in the middle of some camp, paths worn into the ground by many paws. The scent of others was more powerful here than before, assaulting her senses. Sneezing, she tried to clear her nose so she could be alerted if any wolves approached her. He male told her to explain what had happened to the she-wolf he called Hayashi, so she couldn't really move. He had howled her, alerting her they were here, so she had to stay put. Her eyes roamed around the camp, shifting her weight from paw to paw as she inspected the harsh beauty of winter. No other colour seemed to be apparent, white choking out everything else in sight. It coated the earths floor, the empty branches of trees, and coating everything else. Nothing was safe from the fluffy whiteness of winter.

A harsh growl snapped Echo out of her inspection, her rusty red form dropping low in a submissive crouch at its sound. The white wolf before her barked out words, but turned away before she could even open her mouth. Not coming out of her crouch she watched as the female ran over to the male, calling him Reiner. So that was his name! He had never told it to her, just muttering something her single hearing ear could pick up. The blue-eyed wolf seemed genuinely concerned about Reiner's well being, much unlike her previous master. After barking at him to wake up, she marched back over and sat in front of her. She didn't even realize that there was another wolf sitting by her, she was sitting on her deaf side and she did not pick up her scent. She was so startled that she didn't even know what to do.

"Excuse me, dears. He needs a speaking to every once in a while."

Dears? Echo's head tilted to the side as the term of endearment rattled around in her head. She had never been called that before. She didn't seem mad... but, indifferent. Coming out of her submissive crouch she looked up, not meeting the females' eyes. "I'm Ec-ec-ec-echo." she stuttered, cursing her inability to speak. This female had called her stranger as well, not slave. This was getting stranger and stranger... Echo turned the right side of her face away from the female, trying to hide the scar that started at the base of her ear and curved around her cheek until it hit her muzzle. She hated when the puckered scar was so visible, she was ashamed of it. It was a sign of her failure and it reminded her of her dead pups. She shuttered, remembering how they made her watch as her pups were murdered brutally. Returning her attention to Hayashi, but careful not to meet her eyes, she asked her own question. "Y-you-you're Ha-ha-ha-yas-yas-hi?" Echo struggled with her name once again, shaking her head as her ears flattened in embarrassment. She then remembered that Reiner had told her to tell her situation to Hayashi, so taking a deep breath, she opened her maw once more. "R-re-reiner t-t-t-told me t-t-that I nee-needed to t-t-t-tell you wh-why I'm he-her-here. He c-c-claimed me at the Auk-auk-t-t-tion and brought me he-here."

Echo snapped her mouth shut as soon as she was done explaining herself, whining softly. She wasn't use to talking so much, she was use to going though her day without saying a single word. She hoped that if this Alpha was better than her last master that she could get over her stutter. It was brought on by her horrific past, but if she could forget what happened and move on maybe it would go away. Maybe with practice communicating she would get over it. All these maybe's and what if's, Echo was sick and tired with it. She just wanted to be free. Looking up at Hayashi, briefly meeting her eyes. Maybe she was different, maybe maybe maybe! Hopefully she would find out soon.

[⋆Ravɛn]

BECK

(When it falls apart,
I won't be there)

The entire journey back to Hayashi's land, not a word was spoken. Beck wondered briefly if this made Hayashi uneasy, but he figured that if it did, she would speak to him. Ask him questions, something of the sort. But instead, she remained as silent as the Sklavin trailing after her. That was fine with Beck. Silence had never bothered the brute. In fact, he usually welcomed it. Silence was a friend to Beck, one that he embraced warmly. No explanations, no questions, no excuses. Just blessed silence. It was comfortable, familiar, even when nothing else in his world was. There was always silence, lurking somewhere, waiting to softly blanket the world. It was quite beautiful, Beck thought. But then again, maybe Beck had a twisted view of 'beautiful'.

They had been moving through the forest for some time when, suddenly, Hayashi changed. She came to an abrupt halt, a growl slipping from between her lips as her ears shot up. Beck froze behind her, confused. Instead of taking action or asking if something was wrong, however, he stood with a slightly rigid posture, his eyes slowly moving around. Had she seen or scented something that he hadn't?

Suddenly she was moving again, a bit quicker now, and Beck hurried to follow, still saying nothing. Maybe it had been a false alarm, and they were on their merry way now, but something was whispering to Beck that it wasn't the case. Slightly more alert now, Beck easily kept pace with Hayashi as she moved, light brown eyes still roaming. When a howl pierced the silence, Hayashi moved even faster, and Beck knew both that they were in her lands finally, and that something was amiss. He picked up his pace, wondering if there would be some form of drama waiting for Hayashi.

"Who are you? Why are you here?"

At first, the question confused Beck. It took him a moment to realize that Hayashi had halted before another wolf, and quickly he brought himself to a stop behind her, examining the small wolf curiously. Before he could truly get a good look, however, Hayashi whirled and stormed towards a den that had previously escaped Beck's notice.

"Reiner!"

Ah, so that wolf curled before Hayashi inside of the dens was Reiner. Beck couldn't get a good look at him just yet, but judging by the way Hayashi was ranting, he assumed that he would soon. He didn't think that anyone could sleep through that harsh tone. Shaking his head slightly, Beck glanced back to the wolf that he assumed was also a Sklavin, circling around to sit beside her. When Hayashi had finished her ranting and came to sit beside them, asking them to excuse her and calling them dears, Beck noticed the confusion that flickered across the other wolf's face. He could understand. Hayashi was a bit of a mystery to him as well, but he was slowly getting used to it.

"I'm Ec-ec-ec-echo." The wolf said in response to Hayashi inquiring about her name. At first, the stutter alarmed Beck, but quickly he recovered. He felt a small pang of pity for her, wondering if trauma caused the speech impediment, or if she had always had it. More curious than ever, Beck sat silently, watching and listening as Echo went on to explain about Reiner. When she had finished, Beck slowly nodded his head in greeting to her. He was sure that she was just as nervous as he was, and he wasn't going to be the one to make things harder for her.

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REINER

"Reiner!"

The goddess had returned. It was difficult to keep his eyes closed from her beauty, but the male forced himself into self submission. He had to sell his part. Reiner didn't move a muscle as she ridiculed him, drawing upon pictures of Sicoya to quiet himself. It seemed his eyes had only fluttered closed moments before, the heavy doubts and worries of his mind lifting. Thanks to Hayashi, however, the weights and sand bags were returning, dropping on his chest like lead. It hit him over and over, numbing his senses as the anxieties were welcomed back.

"Did I tell you that you could leave the lands alone, unattended? And come back with a slave? And even more, you leave the poor thing out there by herself, to explain to the alpha why she was brought here? For all I knew, you were in danger! If I hadn't been of clear mind, I would've attacked that wolf out there. Is that what you wanted? Wake up!"

There was no fooling her. Reiner hesitantly blinked open one eye to gaze at the Alpha, his brows furrowed in mock fear. It was true, his actions had been precisely deliberate and simply ignorant. He'd wanted to push some buttons, wrestle with Hayashi's rule a bit. It wasn't in a spiteful, jealous way but rather in a sightly flirtatious, teasing way. Whether she'd take it as playful or a challenge to her rule was yet to be determined. She wouldn't be able to completely fault him however--he'd brought her a slave and in a sense a new member to her pack.

Reiner had shut his eyes again for a moment of consideration. How should he respond? Stubbornly the male laid inside the front of the cave, flicking his short red and white tail over the back of his legs. When he opened his mouth to respond, Reiner did a a small double take; Hayashi had left her rant as soon as she'd started. She-wolves. The male rolled his eyes and stumbled halfheartedly out of the cave towards Hayashi. He might as well show Echo he wasn't the headstrong, rude brute he came off to be.

His eyes landed on another wolf as he approached, the light khaki color a different chord to what he was used to. Pfft, who was he to judge? His own towering front legs and blazing red fur was enough to label him as abnormal. Not to mention the large ears and fluffed mane that rode his spine. Hmph. Reiner made himself forget the outward appearances as he strode closer, grey eyes narrowing. Apparently Hayashi had been on the same wave length as he had been, bringing back a sklain within moments of his return. Interesting, no doubt.

Reiner let a soft whine off his lips as he gentle nudged Hayashi's shoulder. He sat by her right side, his tail dropped to show a sense of apology. Even if he didn't say it out loud, he would never purposefully anger Hayashi. Tease her, joke around? Absolutely. Hurt on purpose? No. Reiner dared himself as he leaned into her ear, forcing him to whisper a few words that were meant only for her.

"I missed you."

As soon as the sweet side surfaced it vanished, leaving Reiner still as he evaluated the new male. It was all too apparent this brute wasn't a freior by his stance and the deafening silence that continued. His eyes were lowered and his tail swept to the side, un-aggressive and yet hintingly curious. Reiner spoke softly as to not startle Echo; she seemed to be the frailest of the group and the most soft spoken as well, even for her edgy stutter.

"I'm Reiner. And you are...?"

It was non invasive and yet inquiring. If these were to be his new pack mates he needed to show them that he could be trusted and that not everything was a game to him. Eyes flickering warily, Reiner glanced at Hayashi. It was the typical "How-am-I-doing" look he gave her when she was momentarily upset with him. Hopefully he hadn't done any permanent damage with his games.

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[`| κιrs♥]

-- hayashi

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The alpha eyed the small sklavin, curiosity quickly filling her features, briefly shown. The slave looked confused when Hayashi spoke, almost embarrassed as she hid her face. There was something odd about her, even compared to most submissive slaves. Hayashi wondered why Reiner had picked her out of the bunch; maybe it was his curiosity as well.

"I'm Ec-ec-ec-echo."

When she spoke, her voice surprised Hayashi, but she didn't let it show. The slave's eyes hadn't even met hers once this confrontation, so she wasn't too worried about that showing through. She reminded her of Beck, eyes always glued to the ground.

Y-you-you're Ha-ha-ha-yas-yas-hi?"

The fem simply nodded. She tried not to let Echo's speech bother her; this would take some getting used to.

"R-re-reiner t-t-t-told me t-t-that I nee-needed to t-t-t-tell you wh-why I'm he-her-here. He c-c-claimed me at the Auk-auk-t-t-tion and brought me he-here."

Hayashi smiled, blue eyes rolling over the female's small frame. She felt bad for the fem, there was obviously a tragic reason for the way she was. She spoke to her, her honey laden voice slow, softer, but still indifferent. It was the same tough act she had on all day. "Echo, please look at me when you speak. " Hayashi paused, allowing Echo to recover if need be. "Well, I appreciate you explaining that to me, but I was hoping Reiner would be the one to inform me, instead of leaving you to fend for yourself." the alpha shot a hard look at Reiner, who was walked slowly up behind her. A whine echoed in her ear, low and soft, just loud enough for her to hear.

"I missed you."

The three words he murmured in her ear made a shiver roll down her spine, but she tried to hide her emotions from the two new wolves before her. Although such simple speech, it shocked her. Not the fact that it had come from Reiner, a troubled, long-known friend, but rather that the words seemed so odd, so old. They brought back memories of her mate, the way he would whisper things in her ear, brush her softly... the way everything he said threatened to bring her to her knees. There was no doubt that Hayashi and Xercese were one being; back then, they were inseparable. But her heart had left with him when Mirage snatched him away, shattered into pieces. Since then, it's seemed Hayashi hasn't had a heart. To her, it felt that way. She was so unlike herself it frightened her. She could only feel two emotions; pain, and anger. But since coming here to the lands of Ravensbruck, she had become stronger, more like the great, beautiful Alpha she once was. And she was growing on this rusty wolf. She could always see something on Reiner's face when he gazed at her, speaking for him. It felt weird to be loved again, to love again.

"I'm Reiner. And you are...?

His now-hardened words shattered her thoughts, pulling her back down to reality. She blinked her blue eyes, looking at the two quiet wolves, waiting for their response. She had hope for them, hope for a strong pack. She planned to discuss their future, give them hope, show them that she was different. No, they would not be slaves. She would train them. They will be strong, proud wolves, and great additions to the pack. But for now, and as that process went along, Hayashi would play the bad guy, roughen them up. She hoped nothing backfired on her now. [/blockquote][/size][/color]

[Dakki]

There was so much going on around her, that she was happy that not everyone was talking. Her mind was buzzing with all the words that were being thrown at her, and she hoped that it would stay quite. Echo dreaded having to open her maw again and talk, she hated wolves hearing her stutter. It was so embarrassing and it made her feel like a fool. She was happy that the male beside her wasn't speaking. He seemed to be like her, a Sklavin by her guess. When she spit out her name she saw that the one beside her nodded a greeting. She looked over at him now, a small smile on her lips. She was trying to so her gratitude towards him, he was the one thing keeping her from racing away. If she could concentrate on his silence, she would be okay.

The red toned wolf looked at her new master when she spoke towards her. She asked her to look at her when she spoke, something she was never allowed to do before. Slowly she raised her pale blue eyes to her icy ones, her lips twitching with the force it took her to do so. It had been so ground into her that is was hard to do. Since she wasn't talking, she dropped her gaze back to her paws. Then Hayashi said something about wanting Reiner to tell her, causing her gaze to shift up to his lanky black legs. He was so tall! She hadn't really noticed before, everyone looked taller than you when you were crouched in the dirt. He asked for their names, but he already knew that hers was Echo. Well, unless he had forgotten her name already.

Echo lifted her head up fully, glancing around at the three wolves that surrounded her. She caught a glance between her new master and the tall one. She tilted her head, taking in their body posture. "Is R-reine-r y-y-your m-m-m-mat-t-te?" she asked, wanting to know if she had been talking to her Alpha Male the whole time. There was certainly some feelings there, she could see it plainly. She looked over at the other male, seeing if he knew anything about it. Not knowing what else to do she shifted her weight, longing for a cave to sleep in. A yawn spread her jaw, and she looked down to hide her maw from the others. When she lifted her head, she realized that her giant scar was in plain view for everyone to see. Echo's eyes grew wide and she twisted her neck so that her scarred side was hidden in the fur of her shoulder. Ugh, she hated this thing. She was going to have to find a better way to hide it...

ooc;; Sorry its so short... she didn't really have much to do xP

[⋆Ravɛn]

BECK

(When it falls apart,
I won't be there)

So many things going on, so much to take in. Beck was scared to blink, feeling like he would miss something if he did. He watched the exchange between Hayashi and Echo, noticing how surprised the small Sklavin seemed when Hayashi requested the same thing she had asked of Beck. It was certainly odd, being a Sklavin and being asked to look into the eyes of someone who was higher up the ladder than you. It would, without a doubt, take some adjusting to. But it that was what Hayashi wanted...well, it was expected of them to obey, wasn't it?

Beck's eyes were drawn to the male wolf he assumed was Reiner as he slunk out of the dens, making his way towards them. Upon arriving, he leaned forward, whispering something into Hayashi's ear. He was definitely no Sklavin, then. Her reaction was...curious, and Beck tilted his head, slightly confused. Who was this Reiner? And how, pray tell, did Beck react to him if Reiner happened to speak to him?

As if he had read Beck's thoughts, Reiner turned, directing words to him. "I'm Reiner. And you are...?"

Well, damn. How did Beck respond to him? Throw in a 'sir', just for good measures? It was the safe option. Much safer, in fact, that appearing disrespectful and later finding out that he had made a mistake. So, his mind made up, Beck dipped his head just slightly. "My name is Beck, sir," he responded in his usual tone, a tone that he was sore could have bored even the best wolves to death. But they would get used to it. Despite Hayashi's kindness, despite this strange new place that was home..at the end of the day, Beck was, well, Beck. A voice that could put you to sleep and the emotional range of a grasshopper. Yes, that was Beck for you.

"Is R-reine-r y-y-your m-m-m-mat-t-te?"

Echo's voice made Beck glance up, only to realize that she was looking at him, seeming to wonder if he knew anything about the two wolves standing before them. Beck shrugged his shoulders just slightly as if to say, beat's me. In fact, he was glad she had asked, although one might not be able to tell. He hadn't any idea how to address Reiner, or how to treat him. While it was obvious he was no Sklavin, that was about as far as Beck's observations went.

With his eyes still on Echo, Beck watched silently as she lifted her head and then quickly lowered it. It took him a moment, but slowly it dawned on him that she was hiding the scarred side of her face. Almost without thinking, Beck leveled his gaze at her, his mouth opening before he could stop the words. "Don't hide yourself. Not for anyone," he muttered, before realizing what he had said and glancing at Hayashi apologetically.

Don't hide yourself? Aren't you one to talk..

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REINER

"My name is Beck, sir,"

It was the simple monotone response that rubbed indifferently against Reiner; still he paused accordingly, unsure of how to take the tawny brute's response. At last he simply dipped his head and said nothing, offering no judgment verbally or emotionally. He figured it better to let the new additions relax first before figuring out their quirks and oddities. Surely there would be enough time for that later. Reiner let grey eyes rest again on Hayashi as if waiting for a command. Did she want to talk more of their combined past? Maybe in private? Or would she prefer to talk with the new arrivals and allow them to become more comfortable with their new home? Echo's stuttering broke into the male's thoughts almost immediately, her coarse voice numbing still.

"Is R-reine-r y-y-your m-m-m-mat-t-te?"

Every hair seemed to freeze as the female struggled to ask the simple question. Reiner himself stiffened significantly, hardly daring to breath as he glanced into the canopy above. Did the two of them seem like that to her? Obviously they appeared to be somewhat involved with one another because otherwise the question would never have materialized as it had. Then again, maybe Echo had mistaken closeness through pack relations as otherwise romantic inclinations. Reiner blinked a few times as he struggled to define his relationship with the she-wolf beside him.

Sure, something within him had always held a some-sort of makeshift cupidity for the beige female. She was the graceful dancer of Sobibor's Hrellia to him, with her soft pirouettes through the dense forests, her arabesques in the moon laden nights. That creamy fur was striking in contrast to others, the pale blue eyes incomparable to the ocean's own hues. He'd made an attempt to court her all those months and years ago when they were younger, wilder. Hayashi had always been beside another however, the bold and brash Xercese whose leadership was the thing Reiner himself had bowed before. Xercese alone had been her favored partner for the ravishing salsa, her first pick for the driving sexualities of the quick-worked samba. Reiner had hardly held a candle to the strength and rewards that lay with the pack Alpha. He'd known it too, and from the very beginning.

"Don't hide yourself. Not for anyone,"

Beck's monotonous voice sounded before him and the maned wolf gave a start, his eyes blurring from being unfocused. Reiner snarled inwardly, forcing himself to focus on the matter at hand. How easily he lost himself to the memories sometimes! His mind was so vulnerable, so utterly and completely helpless to the senseless trappings that Sicoya had placed over him. He didn't even need to think of her anymore to get twisted into the mines, his intentions forgotten in the caverns of physical reflections he'd built for himself. He was so deeply intertwined in the past at times that finding the present had became a true challenge of the mind.

You need to pull yourself together. The male clamped his eyes shut before barking the words in a tumbled mass, his voice rougher than before. He didn't dare look at Hayashi's face as he spoke, instead turning away. He couldn't bear to see the hurt in her eyes if she felt that way for him. He wasn't good enough anyways. She deserved someone better. Someone who wasn't haunted by the hallucinations of a long dead she-wolf.

"No. My mate is dead."

Reiner let his words drop like lead balloons before shuffling off, his motions stiff and awkward. He needed rest. Everything else could wait. Snarling at himself, Reiner padded quietly back to the cave, dropping onto the floor without bracing himself. The cold floor was a shock to him and yet he didn't make a sound, his ears too focused on how the conversation would proceed behind him. He cared for Hayashi and yet he left her there to defend herself, left her to feel the pain. Then again, maybe she didn't care for him at all. The flirting and sweet gestures were probably all in his mind, just like Sicoya.

I'm sorry, Hayashi. I'm not ready yet...

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[`| κιrs♥]

-- hayashi

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[/color][/right][/size]She could see Beck silently conversing with Echo, which Hayashi was glad for. She could see that even a little comradeship between them calmed her nerves, took the spotlight off a little. A little bonding would make things easier for Echo. But still with effort, almost as if chains were bound to her slim neck, Echo raised her eyes to meet Hayashi's, only for a brief moment. She watched as Echo dropped her head again, awkwardness and embarrassment fluttering to her face. It was to be expected, and Hayashi saw it all the time. It was frightening, odd, to look into a masters face. The inflicter of pain. Looking a dominor in the face deserved punishment, shame. She knew. But within seconds of glaring at the dirt, her eyes were up again, a wide stare at Reiner, then shifting among the group. Curiosity and bashfulness radiated from her gaze. A surprising statement, flying towards Hayashi without warning. She spoke it so plainly, so matter-of-factually, it caught Hayashi off guard. Echo dropped her gaze again, shielding her face from the group. Beck murmured a few words to her, but Hayashi couldn't focus on anything else that was going on. "Is R-reine-r y-y-your m-m-m-mat-t-te?"

It struck a chord in her head. She could sense Reiner staring at her, and she knew he could read to expression on her face. It hung in the air, like an anvil hovering over either of their heads. It was a thought that seemed so wrong to her, so out of this world. A mate? After her first partner, it felt like her ability to love had been stripped from her, turned to stone. Done away with. But yet it was so obvious, almost imminent, that Reiner and herself ended up together. Right? There was just that mutual hurt, loneliness, regret. They thought alike, the mourned alike. Sure, Reiner had a little more blood on his hands than she did. But it was that ruined past, those strangled emotions that brought them to a silent understanding. An understanding that went deeper than words, deeper than the surface. It was strange to her. All her life, she felt like she had never been understood. Of course, as a slave, no one cared about you; yet, even other slaves didn't understand her. There were no 'fellow sufferers' for her. They couldn't see past the looks, the pretty face. Surely there wasn't anybody worthwhile under that face, anybody suffering. She's stingy, the favorite, the spoiled. What could she know? How could she be hurting? But to have a wolf understand her feelings, even to a point, was beyond what she was accustomed to. She didn't quite know how to handle it, how to respond to it, and maybe that's why she was ruining the connection between her a her new companion. She couldn't read him like she could Xercese; Reiner's face was constantly masked, focused, unrelenting. It was too hard to tell what he was really feeling, or if he was just faking it. Hayashi was too scared, too anxious, to depend on the fact that he indeed had feelings for her. Who knew? She didn't want to be wrong.

"No. My mate is dead."

Those five words knocked her back down to earth, flat out. His mate. Still his mate, was the message she was getting. Even after all this time. Although the words were heavy, cold, they had feelings to them. Maybe ones Hayashi couldn't pick out, but she knew they were there. Her heart fluttered, a shocked expression exploding on her face, hurt prominent. She had spent so long chewing over the thought of Reiner, wondering about the possibilities, wondering about what went on in his head. And it had all blown up in her face, easy as that. There were reasons why Hayashi didn't give her heart out; she knew it would be trampled on. But could she take it so personally? Was it just how he was, his perspective? It was hard to believe, but she wanted to. She wanted to believe that he did have those feelings, he just didn't have to effort to use them, to even believe them. That he was too hurt, too confused to realize them. But why should she sugar-coat the truth? There was nothing to be had, nothing to be gained. Hayashi was always too optimistic, too hopeful. Sometimes it lifted some situations; others, like this, ruined. She gazed after Reiner's retreating figure, emotions seeping through her facade.

Silence rung in her ears, bringing to her attention the wolves standing in front of her, awkwardly. She felt so bad to bring them into this, and she didn't want to make Echo feel bad in any way for asking that question. It was an obvious question to ask. Hayashi dropped her gaze to her creams paws, staring angrily at the dying grass between them. This was how she coped. No one should see her suffer, feel pain. She let it off as anger, indifference. She wanted to look stronger than she was, stronger than her screaming emotions would show her as. She lifted her gaze to the two sklavins, eyes bright and piercing, yet clouded, blurred with emotions. She nodded her head in apology to the pair before speaking to them, her voice heavy.

"No, no." She shook her head, pausing. Her tough act still present. "Mine too." For all she knew, Xercese was dead. Shouldn't he be, at least to her? "I apologize for the ... interesting first day here in my lands. I promise you, this is no normal day. I only want to make you comfortable in your new home, among your new family. As of for right now, I have nothing more for you. Feel free to hunt, sleep in the dens behind me, or stay right where you are. But I expect you both to report here, tomorrow morning before sunrise. There are a few things I want to speak with you about." She forced a smile; crooked, wrong. Before she could crack anymore, she nodded to the pair, lithely brushing past them, heading for the small ravine hidden among the trees and large rocks. Swiftly she padded up to it, bounding up on top of the largest, flat rock, lying down on it. Hayashi rested her head on her paws, cold, blank eyes staring aimlessly at the slowly bubbling water before her.


1039 words... blah![/blockquote]
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